Praia

Im sitting on the beach in brazil. Clear blue water with salvadors cityscape off in the distance. It seems unreal, but I saw more than ever the difficulties with our kids. The anger that arises out of nowhere. How they talk back to us and have no gratitude for this trip. I am often saddened, but I must constantly remember these kids are not like other poor children here who have traces of family left. And most definitely are unlike kids in the us. I remember the kids where I used to work and well maybe they aren't SO different. They just need more love. But they also push push push away the love you give them. It takes more time to win their respect. They only respond to spanking but because I'm white I cannot touch a child here that way. What complication! We don't have running water here which makes me appreciate the fazenda. The hardest part of my life here is the community life. I notice I'm American when it is sooooo hard to SIT and eat three times a day. It seems torturous to talk after I've eaten as there are many more important things to do. I still hate cooking and cleaning. I no longer run because I'm much too tired and I have adopted the Brazilian butt and belly. They asked me to delve into the culture, right? My personality has become even stronger as I think it's a requirement in the fazenda that everyone has one. My likes and dislikes are easier to see and I'm discovering talents I've never had. I have knee pain from genuflecting so many times a day. My time in adoration is now a daily essential and I actually enjoy morning and evening prayer. My favorite moments are when the kids arrive just to see what I'm doing and give me a hug. Daniel now prays during each time of intercessions for "the family of Erica" I still have many special Er moments. I was leaving the refetorio with my hands full on the same route as always. It was dark and mateus drilled a deep hole. I didn't know. My foot went right in. It went to midthigh so Aldo had to literally pull me out. And my first words? Shoot, I didn't plan on showering again. It's a lot of work to bowl water on the stove each time...... Happy fourth of July! I'm going to celebrate by sending the kids back for their first day after break! Yippee Love e

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