I think so often, “I need to write this in a blog,” and now as I sit here trying to type, I cant think of one thing. It’s been an exciting time here because we have 8 French boyscouts doing a mission here for a month. It has been so nice to mix up our routine that we have fallen into at the Fazenda. And we received a new American last week!! I love to be able to relate to her… like the fact that she also finds eating breakfast all together every morning, talking, to be difficult. I feel satisfied in my cultural habits and tendencies. Ive been playing a lot of soccer with the boyscouts and kids. I still am horrible. And I keep falling on the same exact knee. Three days now I have fallen on this knee. It is so cut up and I think infected. But I don’t cry. I basically just run around the field and if the ball comes near me, I kick it—or at least try to kick it. I make contact about 50% of the time. The mixture of french/portuguese/english/spanish is quite amusing as well.
I visited Tete’s school yesterday. I left feeling so sad and helpless and dying to do something. It was 13 kids in a square, tiny room without ONE thing on the wall. Well except the white board. The desks were twice the size of the kids and was in no order what so ever. When they felt like moving, they moved. One 10 year old was playing with a car on the floor and came and went as he chose. A few kids were listening and working, but most were talking with their neighbors. It was a mess. The kids go to school at 7:30 and leave at 11:30. They eat a snack and lunch in this time. No wonder Tete, with 7 years, doesn’t know her alphabet. Her afternoon teacher cries because Tete is so horrible, but told me she was glad that Tete doesn’t use bad words anymore. When I spoke with the director about getting a paper for Tete to go to a counselor after school, she looked at me as if I were crazy and asked if I actually thought she needed it. I felt so sad for my little Tete and her friends. Children who have potential, but are not given a chance. When I got back to the Fazenda, I slept. That’s my defense when things are too tough to take or understand.
But the experience also gave me the second part of my dream job. What if I could travel the world decorating poor schools? What if I raised money part of the year and the other part I went to the schools to make interactive learning spaces, to create excitement to learn, to change the environment we put our poor children into for most of their tiny lives. I wonder if its possible. I guess every organization starts like this—an idea. Do you think people would donate to this? Does it seem worthy? All I know is that as I sat in adoration my dreams soared and again I had this assurance in my heart that I don’t often feel. I just know that Tete and kids like her, will never learn with a pencil and paper and blank walls. She needs to touch, feel, explore this world she’s a part of. I believe she has a chance to be educated, but it wont happen in this sad state of a school she’s in.
I have a huge prayer request. Yesterday Bea had a very high fever and was vomiting green mucus. She went to the doctor and was hospitalized with an invention in her lungs. Last year she stayed there for 10 days. I am going to stay with her in the afternoon and see how she is. But please pray for my sweet, sweet girl. Pray that after this, we can get her into the psychiatrist too. I think a lot of her illnesses are coming from her head and if we don’t help her, it’s just going to get worse with age.
I pray for you all often and each day feel more connected with your souls. Please pray for me on this treachorous and beautiful walk I’m on.
Love, E
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